La vita come volontà di rappresentazione

Sarà il mio sguardo, sarà che ho più bestemmie sulla lingua che sangue nelle  vene, sarà che l'umanità si divide in due categorie (le merde e i miei X-[Wo]Men), comunque sia... Boh.
Seriamente: tu che mi chiedi l'accendino e poi mi chiedi anche di fumare con te e, mentre t'arricci le frange della sciarpa, con leggerezza mi chiedi il numero di telefono (vecchia, ormai c'è Ask.fm!).
Seriamente: tu nordafricano d'ascendenti berberi che mi minacci di morte perché alla tua insistenza ho risposto con "ma diocan?!".
Seriamente: tu che mi scrivi nel cuore della notte perché io venga a trovarti dopo 2 anni che non ci vediamo.
Seriamente: tu che mi aiuti a progredire col teorema di "tutto è violenza" e mi spingi a cantare gli Steel Panther con tanto di air-guitar.
Seriamente: tu che mi vedi quotidianamente e butti l'ombrello a terra perché lo raccolga e io ti ignoro.
Seriamente: tu che, appena presentati, mi ridi in faccia incurante del lifting facciale in arrivo a suon di nocche e brutalità.
E seriamente: voi, miei X-Men, D., L., M., Z., B. e C. che riuscite a non ammazzarmi ogni volta.

Sarà che sono così un duro che non se ne accorgono ma ho vinto anche stavolta.

Sarà che tremo ogni volta che sto con te, ultima e definitiva seriamente, io diocan ti voglio portare in spalla all'altare e in culo tutto il resto.

C for Coglione

Oggi ritorno a perdere tempo e scrivo la bomba dell'anno:

#include <stdio.h>

#include <stdlib.h>

#include <math.h>

int main ()

{

FILE *data;

data = fopen("data.c", "w");

char form[100];

printf("insert function\n");

scanf("%s", form);

fprintf (data, "#include <stdio.h>\n#include <stdlib.h>\n#include <math.h>\nint main ()\n{\n double x, y;\n y=%s;\nprintf(\"%s=%%lf\\n\", y);\n return 0;\n}\n", form, form);

fclose (data);

system("export gccpath=\"$(which gcc)\" && $gccpath data.c -lm && ./a.out");

//system("gcc data.c -lm && ./a.out");

return 0;

}

My long awaited nothingness

So here I am.
There is nothing valuable to say except that life is streaming powerful through this boiling blood of mine.
The same life I breath every morning, the same life that allows me to raise my head toward the horizon, with grin on my face and numbness evaporating.
I am not actually ready, I've never been ready. But right now I know that my centre of mass is steady, the momentum is ready to be released and all the future kinematic ain't determined yet. I'm just a compressed spring, lock 'n' loaded, ready to strike.

There was uncertainty in the past. I was trapped into the nightmare of "I fear what's next".
Now something else replaced the fear.
"Be C infinite!" I scream everyday to the mirror. That's the solution: being infinitely differentiable, hell!, you must be analytic all over the domain!
Play it smooth, let it flow, laugh at everything because everything is just the only and unique opportunity you have.

The quote of the day is something like:
"Men live two lives. The second begins when you realize there's only one life".

You know, recently I got involved in a fight. I was completely innocent and because of a friend I was targeted by two junkies. They started kicking and punching me, until I decided to flee with a motherfucking rush of adrenaline.
I felt the pain where I was hit but I also realized the potential.
Hadn't I fled, I could have killed those two idiots.

I had tons of experiences in the last month and everything led me to reformulate my rules.
Now I know why you wanna hate me.
Now I see the dancing scythe much too close and now I say "fuck you". Precisely.

I say exactly like that to everyone: to the brutal authority and to the bitchy girl, to the rabid dog and to the peaceful granny.

This is not a juvenile revival of useless rebellion.
This is what I want everyone to understand: life is just achieving and enjoy the achievement.
You don't have to be neither selfish nor selfless, you don't need to be detached, no need to be attached.
There is no utopia, no dystopia, no heaven and no hell. There is no odd or even.
No fate.
No faith.
No hope and no despair.

Be smooth, shape with bluntness and shave with bloodlessness.
Write down bullshits in a foreign language and laugh at those that can't see how much you really care.

Be strong and don't hide that YOU CARE, that nothing can scare you.
That every second you breath is an adrenaline rush.

Have you ever seen the rain?

So here we are again, ready for a new day to begin and an amazi... oh, no, sorry.
It's 5 pm* and I just woke up from a mystical state of total "something" and basically I just want to erase something like the last 20 years of my life.

Seriously, people, how can you all live your life without feeling guilty or, at least, pissed off?
Think about it: without even thinking you are inhaling and exhaling some kind of gases mixture, while your "physical" body is just the sum of some 10^13 interacting cells behaving according to rules of causality in order to make you ugly and fat the more Big-macs you eat. But wait! You've got also some mysterious quantum phenomena taking place in your brain, making a mess of unpredictability out of any decision you are supposed to make!
Now tell me, how can you remain serious when your own existence is just a joke?
Feeling pain? You protect yourself.
Hungry? You eat.
Stupid? You die.
That's the way of the flesh, that's the way you are meant to be: a sole survivor, a lone walker, a wasted occupier of space.

I'm not on the edge of insanity nor I'm contemplating suicide. On the contrary, I am very glad to be alive, I'm feeling fine and I dare to say that I LOVE this shitty fact called existence.

I'm just pointing out that we are NOT some legacy of gods or a superior form of life.
We are just (using the anthropological principle) what we are supposed to be with an Earth-size planet like ours and the fundamental interactions we have.
We are just a foreseeable consequence of THAT kind of Big Bang.

And guess what! People bitching around, laughing and talking.
Know this, you children: NOBODY CARES, and nobody ever will.


Just pointing out.



*welcome to Europe motherfucker.

Black&White

When I was young&dumb I used to play Black&White, the God Simulator video-game that kinda nowadays sucks a lot. The problem is that every time I think about something old-school and damn boring or just confused, I associate it with those old black&white movies and said dumb video-game.
In conclusion every colorless thing is being interpreted and processed by my brain as something absurdly stupid.
That's why I usually take my own pictures in B&W, because I AM stupid.

Since last Christmas I tried to express myself with (amazing)^(-1) paintings and the results are astonishing, in the sense that nothing is moved by looking at them and they result plainly mediocre.
"So why doyou publish 'em on your awful blog, then?" you can ask.
Well, because firstly Fuck You and secondly because awfulness has been increased at every upload. It's a damn positive feedback loop, increasing unbounded horrific ugliness day after day.

(Actually I'm just writing with brain in Power Saving Mode, it's an unfiltered train of thought  streamed directly from the brain's right hemisphere to the keyboard. Yeah, I admit it: I'm kinda of practicing my English and you are just the mice in the Lab under surgeon's will).

What was I sayin'? Ah, yeah, Black&White: I have this soft spot for achromatic stuff. Probably you do not care but I believe colors are just a burden for the eyes. And yes, I don't know what the hell I wrote up to HERE.